Despite what its name suggests and how often we associate its occurrence with adolescence, “coming of age” does not necessarily discriminate with age; the transition can happen at any time, however many times, and more often than not it will catch you off guard. Given that such “milestones” may not always be voluntary, they become very hard to predict and even harder to prepare for. It could be as mundane as getting your first job or as sudden as a first heartbreak. It could involve a sacrifice, a change of priorities, a shift in perspective, or in the case of Stephen, a disillusionment; once devoted to his father’s counsel, Stephen gradually begins to lose respect for him as the family plunges deeper and deeper into debt. The point is that a coming of age is not always marked by a specific event but rather the reaction it triggers in you, and that while the impact may not be apparent until you look back, the change is irreversible. We see this with Stephen as he attempts to purge himself of his sinful thoughts or at least compensate for them by establishing abstemious habits, yet cannot help but continue to suffer from the ills of his mind. Our minds are always changing -- for example, while young Stephen seemed rather naive to his “specialness”, his ego eventually blooms in congruence to his awareness and vocabulary. The fact is that while we continue to evolve, some changes happen to be more profound or surprising than others, causing us to label them as “coming of age”.
While reading your post, the ambiguity of the phrase "coming of age" struck me in ways I have not thought about before. It doesn't say "coming of the age 21" or anything. It doesn't say "coming of the Stone Age" (That was a joke, albeit a bad one. Pray forgive me). The idea of being "of age" is fairly common. Being of age to drive, of age to drink, of age to do many things. But coming of age doesn't specify any of these things. It doesn't say "coming of a mature age" either. It just says "coming of age". It is up to us to decide what we have come of age to do, and perhaps we only truly come of age when we discover what that purpose is.
ReplyDeleteI agree with this post completely. Coming of age isn't just one event. And it is completely irreversible. That's what makes it so scary. It comes by you quickly and you might not even know it. But it can never be reversed. Stephen's reactions at the end of each chapter mark his growth and show how he comes of age, though coming of age does not necessarily mean increasing in maturity, especially not in Stephen's case.
ReplyDeleteI think that coming of age is something we may not even know when you have "finished" coming of age. What is the age? What is the state of mind? Is it from going from child to adult? These lines we cross are so blurred it'll be hard to tell. I don't think that one event, such as graduating college, makes you "come of age." It may cause you to look back, and see how far you've come in your life, and your psychological development, but I think coming of age is gradual, and you never really know when its over. We keep maturing and gaining new perspectives, so who knows when we really come of age?
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